Saturday, May 29, 2010
Monday, May 17, 2010
derrivation of deserving
what we (any human being, you) don't deserve: apologies. forgiveness. love. loyalty. friends. any good thing.
what we (I, you, everyone else) deserve: the eternal separation from anything which can bring bring hope, relief, comfort, rest, peace, self-worth, any good thing.
Death is too small a word to define what we deserve.
what we (all of mankind, including you and me) have been offered: purpose. rest. help. forgiveness. loyalty. friendship. love.
In short, grace (getting the things we don't deserve) and mercy (not getting the things we do deserve).
(I, you, he, she, them) we all have to give up our rights--because we don't have them to begin with--and when we do, we will find that what we get in return for our surrender is far better than the things we tried so hard to hold onto and demand, but never really got.
what we (I, you, everyone else) deserve: the eternal separation from anything which can bring bring hope, relief, comfort, rest, peace, self-worth, any good thing.
Death is too small a word to define what we deserve.
what we (all of mankind, including you and me) have been offered: purpose. rest. help. forgiveness. loyalty. friendship. love.
In short, grace (getting the things we don't deserve) and mercy (not getting the things we do deserve).
(I, you, he, she, them) we all have to give up our rights--because we don't have them to begin with--and when we do, we will find that what we get in return for our surrender is far better than the things we tried so hard to hold onto and demand, but never really got.
Friday, May 7, 2010
This is what you get when you make friends with an English major...
I don't know how proficient your Middle English is, but I've just undergone a semester of reading nothing but (except for a brief foray into Geoffrey of Monmouth's HRB, of course, which was translated, and all the Spanish I read in my other three classes). I think my favorite piece of literature was... Duh. The one with Gawain. I've always loved Gawain. Even when he went through his beheading stage... But this semester I was also introduced to Havelok the Dane, who is a pretty awesome guy even if he is a bit lacking in personality--but who can blame him? I mean, if you had had to go through what he went through, you might not have much personality, either. And then there is Troilus. Sigh. Oh, Troilus. You're almost the perfect man, but not quite. If only he had told creepy Pandarus to take a hike. But, Troy was doomed anyway, so, there wasn't much that could have been done about it. Gawain still takes the cake in my book, but I don't know who would win if he and Diomedes got into it... Thoughts?
Anyway, back to the point. I know you'll all think I'm really smart and stuff and just showing off my expensive education, but that's only half of what I'm doing. The other half is this: that in a very random string of links, I came upon this poem. It was what I needed to hear at the time and even a day later and not at my wits' end, it's pretty darn amazing. If you don't want to wade through the weirdly spelled words, I won't blame you, even though the gloss is pretty thorough. I will blame you, though, if you don't re-google the title and find a better translation to suit your non English-majory taste.
Be careful. This poem might just blow your mind clean out of your skull:
In a Valley of This Restless Mind
Stay tuned for "What you get when you make friends with a Spanish major..."
Anyway, back to the point. I know you'll all think I'm really smart and stuff and just showing off my expensive education, but that's only half of what I'm doing. The other half is this: that in a very random string of links, I came upon this poem. It was what I needed to hear at the time and even a day later and not at my wits' end, it's pretty darn amazing. If you don't want to wade through the weirdly spelled words, I won't blame you, even though the gloss is pretty thorough. I will blame you, though, if you don't re-google the title and find a better translation to suit your non English-majory taste.
Be careful. This poem might just blow your mind clean out of your skull:
In a Valley of This Restless Mind
Stay tuned for "What you get when you make friends with a Spanish major..."
Monday, May 3, 2010
Sometimes I feel like...
...I have to lassoo my brain. I'm trying to write a paper (which is typically when I get the greatest desire to blog, because I shouldn't :), but instead of just thinking about what I want to say and then saying it, my brain won't. It's not that I don't want to, exactly. It's more like it tries to go every direction but there. Like, small group tomorrow (crap, I need to email my girls!), those verses I need to get for my friend (and isn't that more important, anyway?), and I wonder if Tania can hang out some time this week, and Johnna, and Tina, and Candus, because I really haven't gotten to see them much (I should call them asap so we can get together before the semester is over!), my room is really due to be straightened up (is that pile the clean clothes, or is that one?), and I haven't gotten to talk, really talk, to Tamara in AGES (which is totally my fault, ihml).
And after I calm myself down about this crazy to-do list that was not that pressing ten minutes ago and that I actually have other time set aside to do, then there's still some invisible film my productive thoughts can't push through. I think that part is fear. Because, what if I try to think about my paper, and I can't? Haven't you HEARD of writer's block? It's a very real and scary thing. I've had it before. And then, what if I do get started and I get stuck half-way through? What if I can't make some of my points and have to start over? What if I CAN'T get started? What if that stupid, hateful, First Paragraph just doesn't come into existence?
Do you see what I have to put up with?
P.s. I have a theory about research papers that I will share in another post. It has revolutionized the way I think about life. Well, not ALL life, just the part of life that houses research papers and their various friends and family.
And after I calm myself down about this crazy to-do list that was not that pressing ten minutes ago and that I actually have other time set aside to do, then there's still some invisible film my productive thoughts can't push through. I think that part is fear. Because, what if I try to think about my paper, and I can't? Haven't you HEARD of writer's block? It's a very real and scary thing. I've had it before. And then, what if I do get started and I get stuck half-way through? What if I can't make some of my points and have to start over? What if I CAN'T get started? What if that stupid, hateful, First Paragraph just doesn't come into existence?
Do you see what I have to put up with?
P.s. I have a theory about research papers that I will share in another post. It has revolutionized the way I think about life. Well, not ALL life, just the part of life that houses research papers and their various friends and family.
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